Potatoes: French Fingerling, Red Bliss, Russian Banana and Creamers
You know you've got a waxy potato when you're slightly turned on just by its name.
One of the above potato names is actually a sex position.
No, just kidding. All of them are.
While we were busy getting fat and covered in grease with our deep-fried starchy potatoes, there was a whole bunch of side action over here, being all delicate with nuanced flavors and unnecessarily erotic names.
Welcome to wax land, home of the sexiest potatoes on the planet.
Starchy potatoes are high in what? STARCH. You’re getting the hang of this. And they’re low in moisture. Aces. You win … nothing. Sorry. We’re broke. We’re so broke we can’t even afford to finish this joke.
Waxy potatoes? Low in starch and … wet. The moisture and lack of starch means the cells inside the potato don’t break down when they’re cooked so, unlike starchy spuds, they hold their shape. Not so good for fluffy baked and mashed things, but very good for using in salads (such as this one which is really fucking good, thanks JO), or roasting, or laying, slowly, delicately, one on top of another, slathered in creamy béchamel …
Is it hot in here??
But, for the love of nightshade, whatever you do, don’t mash these sexy waxy babies, and for fuck’s sake, Carl, DO NOT try to make gnocchi out of them, you absolute monster.
Slight note here: most waxy potatoes are “new” potatoes: picked young, just after the plant has flowered. De-flowered, so to speak … No, we’re sorry, we can’t keep writing this post right now - it feels dirty. We’ll get back to more potatoes tomorrow.
Tasting Notes:
Delicate thin skin, often “shiny” lookingPotato-forward flavorCreamy, moist fleshSmaller than starchy potatoesHolds shape well when cooked
Varieties/Porn Names:
Any “new” potatoesFrench FingerlingRed BlissRussian BananaPee WeesDutch CreamNadineNicolaPink FirPurple Congo
Serving Suggestion:
Creamy AF and shared with multiple partners. Post videos in the comments.